I think back to that day and it was just your sister and yourself celebrating together.
Justin was up north. Your parents and brother were up north. I don’t remember why anyone else wasn’t there.
I am sure there were reasons and you had your reasons. I think the genuine few who might have attended were either sick or couldn’t come.
You were in your 6th month of pregnancy with your first born. I remember as you both sat there and enjoyed a very quiet meal. There was another bigger party going on in the same establishment.
You both noticed all the people together and the difference between you and them.
You were kind of a loner even back than too. Accept yourself Sharon.. You can be happy alone or with people. Either way you are ok.
Sharon you do have so much to look forward too.
I am your future self. I have only one chance to contact you.
So I am sending this to you on this momentous occasion. I have chosen this day for a reason.
To help you through everything that is to come.
To help you face the good times and the difficult times ahead. Yes there will be difficult times.
I won’t tell you what they are because things can and may change after you read this but I will tell you ways to help yourself get through your life as I know it.
You are brave Sharon. Never forget that.
Keep being yourself and let others be themselves too. You see this is the key. Don’t expect people to change but just love them anyway and most of all love yourself. God will be a major force in your life. I know right now your not aware of him the same. People have looked down on you because your married young and were pregnant out of wedlock. But you will have a beautiful family. Souls that bless Justin and yourself mightily… Just navigate the days ahead a little differently.
Stick close to the people who support you and show you love and acceptance in a way you can feel.
Justin is a good man but give him room. Let him be who he is. He isn’t your father so don’t expect him to be.
Don’t put expectations on people they will fail you.. Just love them and give them room to live the way they believe. Don’t just do your life like everyone else does. It is ok to be different. Please do not force your faith on anyone else as I know it has been done to you. I know that is what you have been taught. But it will cause major problems in your future. Embrace who you are but let people embrace who they are. Force does nothing but anger, repress and hurt people. I know it has shaped your life in ways you won’t realize which has been the reason you have abandoned your faith at this point. But true faith is freedom. It is the most beautiful thing on earth.
You see the people around you haven’t known the whole truth. They will misjudge you. Don’t live by what they say or how they treat you if they don’t accept you always. Understanding can be fickle because nobody walks in another persons shoes. Love doesn’t ever stop it draws out the best in people and loves them even at their worst and it may mean letting someone be free from what you hoped they might be.. It always believes and hopes and trusts.
Develop your creative side and when things get hard do not stop feeling or expressing yourself. This will save you a lot of pain. You are a creative loving expressive individual. Seek for people who are the same. When someone doesn’t get you or is hard to be around. Give them space don’t pressure them. Love them. I know I say that a lot but love isn’t force, or expectations. Love is patient and accepting of each other with all our flaws and strengths and it celebrates life in all its forms.. Find your own interpretation of the truth. Do not just accept what you have been taught. Let people also be who they are. Maybe doing this will change your life and whole direction!
Find your own way through. It’s ok to laugh and cry but everyone is not the same. Some are not emotional creatures like you.
Do not look to people for validation. This one will save you a lot of grief. You are loved by GOD always just as you are.. He doesn’t judge you like people do. He isn’t people.. HE made the people and yes they are like Him some ways.. But he is love and beauty and he will tell you this Himself when you most need it. He is with you always. He will never leave.. People will come and go in your life. He sees your heart and your deepest dreams and desires even when you forget them. He knows why you do what you do. You can rest in Him. He is good.. Remember that. People will say its about what you do. No.. Its about what He has done and especially for all of us through his Son and He has forever given us freedom to do and be. Seek Him and you will find. Even if you don’t seek Him He will always seek you.
You will make mistakes. They will never define you! Move on. You are forgiven. His grace is enough!!
There is not only one way to live life but only one source of life!
Enjoy your children.. You will have more.. Love them. It will go fast. Very fast. Let things go that you cant do and treasure every second with them. Hard times will pass. Your children will grow up and be good people and have their own views and they will make mistakes too. Teach them love and kindness and that they are valuable. It doesn’t matter what isn’t done but what matters is that they know God and you love them and accept them. Do what you can and be at peace. You are precious never forget that. No matter how people treat you. Remember you are unique and that is your power. You have much to give. Just by being yourself.
I really hope by sharing these simple things that you will be spared much pain and abandonment. Yes when you live differently to the majority people who shun you. People will misunderstand you but it doesn’t mean you are wrong.
There will be times when you feel very very alone and isolated. You are not ever alone. God is with you. If you keep telling him everything He will give you help through it and comfort you in ways this world could never help you. I truly see that these times are shaping you to help others because you can speak in a way that others cannot. These times are teaching you what real love is. Because love Himself is with you and in you and you have all you need. The rest is just added blessings.. You are enough!!
I expected things and was devastated when they didn’t happen. I tried to be someone I am not and felt lost. I always felt I did not measure up. I could never reach ‘it’ (whatever ‘it’ was). Do not measure who you are against anyone else.. Be YOU in all your fullest measure!! You will have good and bad days. Be honest about it if even if no one else is. You will draw people to you with your open heart but not everyone has good intentions. Beware. Go by your gut. Go where you are accepted and tolerated and where you can be yourself.
Life is precious. Soul is deep. Spirit is always life and peace. Joy is present even in sadness. He is peace.. He is life.. He is hope. He is joy. He is not judgment. He is not rules. He is everywhere.
Your whole life you have been in a building learning things that are not Him. He is not confined in a building. He is not people. He made the people. He made the world. He made you. He made the little life stirring inside you. He made Justin. He made your sister. He made your friends. Life is beauty. Life is free. Life is not the bad stuff.. That is consequences of people not valuing and knowing the preciousness of life and not knowing the real HIM. Life is not just rules either but respect and kindness go a long long way and valuing everyone no matter who they are.
Even when you face pain. There is a way through. Look to HIM. He can give you peace like you wouldn’t believe. He meets you anyplace. He is everywhere. He is love. Oh my. It is not by humanity you will understand this. But by Spirit. That which stirs within. If you can see the world. People. Yourself by Spirit. It will change everything.
I love you Sharon. You inspire many in the future and by being free and enjoying your life. You will inspire many many more. People need you even if they don’t realize it.. Just like you need them!!
God bless and keep you. May His face shine on you and give you peace.. See you at the end.. Ha ha.