Monthly Archives: February 2015

I Begin

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Revelations

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The true monastery was not dependant on the enclosure of walls. It was rather, a quality of consciousness or a state of heart that involved daily commitment to maintain an inner aloneness — that place where God and soul dwell in intimacy.
— Beverly Lanzetta

I’m working personally through an Ebook from Scribd “The Artist’s Rule” by Christine Valters Paintner..

Doing an exercise where I had to ask my inner monk, my inner artist three questions. These questions will initiate my quest through art of where I am currently in life and what questions I wished to ask God Spirit in me and therefore explore and express in this way.

Had to take three pieces of water colour paper and write these questions (after some contemplation) on the back. I was than to mix them up and turn them over.

Than without knowing which question was on the paper and in essence putting the questions aside for now. Using water colour paint and cut out pictures that I’m drawn too that resonate with me in a positive way and cover that paper as I felt at the time. Not to overly think it but let it flow freely.

I will add my 3 questions than the art that came about (unplanned) on the other side of the paper.. I was amazed how without knowing I was tuned somehow through my Spirit and God differently for each and yet how I’ve expressed myself and the ways I’ve done it do indeed speak to me about that particular question amazingly.. Unlike so many times before I will let me art speak for itself.

The whole process shows me God is involved with my creativity, spirit, what I’m sensing and feeling and expressing. I can see more and more messages speaking to me as I look at them and contemplate further..

First Question

How to bring out from the treasure trove inside?

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What is Gods path for me through inspiration, writing, encouragement, spirit, truth and yet still being in isolation?

The funny thing is this question seen here in my own handwriting and I have to share the way I’ve written the word “writing” it also looks like waiting… Strangely both words fit.. God is saying to me that the waiting is important enough to question.. 🙂

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What does my journey teach me?

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Trusting

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I’m sitting here on my bed propped up with pillows.
I cried earlier.. emotional. Time of month but also because I’ve had ongoing struggles with a teenage son.
At Psychiatrist yesterday. Missed a lot of school. Variety of things. Mental health but in this new year also physical as well. Almost all of us came down with stomach virus and pains. Son got that too and it has seemed to set him back.

Doing some art today. My art is so basic. Even the background ripped as I painted it. I leave it though because it symbolizes the difficulties that I’ve faced. My art is cut and paste.. simple. The message is about a scripture, or my interpretation of it.

I will post two art pieces I’ve done on this scripture that also speak about my faith, life and how I’ve dealt with it all.

Everything that happens to me draws me to the only source of peace I know.. the blue represents peace.. the purple my royalty (kingdom of GOD)… Scriptures say we are in a spiritual battle, but GOD with us. I focus alot on JESUS..
I have talked about being disabled here.. deaf. Hearing loss isolates from people. Life circumstances isolate.

My faith has been my strong hold.

Scripture.. art.. from working/reading through this book.. “The Artist’s Rule: Nurturing Your Creative Soul with Monastic Wisdom..by Christine Valters Paintner

“Now I am revealing new things to you
Things hidden and unknown to you
Created just now, this very moment.
Of these things you have heard nothing until now.
So that you cannot say, Oh yes, I knew this.”
Isaiah 48:6-7

Simply talks to me about NOW… but also intimacy and no distractions. Very close.. Personal. Whispered secrets.
New. I definitely feel love.. special.. privileged. Authoritative. Trust.. Presence..

I have to learn to let what I do expressive-wise speak for itself. Definitely no fear to put out art that is simple, ripped page ha ha.. My blog is not really frequented much either.. but despite all the reasons not to share this.. I still do..

Although I open this post with truth about struggles. My art expresses my spirit, my help my strength and what I learn in all this. This is the weird irony of spiritual life as opposed to physical life. That we walk by faith not sight.
God unseen but to those who believe HE is more real than anything you can see..

I mean a lot of people misunderstand me and I guess I can understand that being the kind of person people know and judge me as.
I say judge lightly because I mean perception and how I come across.. And I love this that God doesn’t judge by outward but by the heart of a person.. He looks deeper.. He is deep!

Physically I’m not stand out in any way.. My art reflects that.. But in every soul there is treasure. People look through trash and find treasure.. Not saying I’m trash but that on deeper inspection you can find so much more than you thought possible.. Which is what I try to show..

The fact that in good and bad I can speak to GOD 24/7. Yes I have to believe HE is there.. Have to believe despite troubles HE is there.. but that’s what all these troubles have done is to show me HE is.
Made me find HIM in a desperate kind of way. When people back away or that’s what it feels (even family) there has been no one else.. That’s where HE became centre stage..

It has not stopped the troubles but rather I have and continue to get through them.

I looked at this page and I think why not decorate it more.. dress it up.. But I can’t. It says what I want it to say. What it means to me. I am a very umm dis-organised person.. more so over the years. But in all this.. my focus has narrowed to JESUS alone as I keep saying.. I don’t know what it all means neither do I give in to fear. I just press on.. I seek HIM first.. I trust.

I also try to express it along the way…

I feel tired, its more than a physical tiredness but it makes me look to HIM.. and lean on HIM.. for dear life.. for strength… for peace.. for guidance… for HIS help and YES HIS promises to come to pass around me for whatever this all means..

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God with me always

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Just a bit of sharing and pics cause I can!

I turned 45 years young yesterday in Australia 12th of February..

Been doing a lot more praying of late.. Circumstances drive me to it.

What wise counsel have you been given lately? How has it helped you in your personal life?

I can only say the counsel has come through people led by HIS Spirit.. Like last night I had a bad dream than couldn’t get back to sleep.. Checked my phone and someone who doesn’t normally converse with me on face book but yet who I am connected too /friends with messaged me.
Seemed same hour as I was awakened was their usual time of deep intense prayer.. They had been fasting and praying and my profile had come to their attention. God spoke to them concerning me.
Although I’ve heard similar many times what they said I don’t know, just the way it came and when it came gives me renewed hope and strength.. That they also knew I’d been struggling..
Wow even as I stirred at night in the darkness.. God was there encouraging me and it just so touches my heart and helps me go on to what is to come..

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Ohh haven’t been been here so long..

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So to get myself back in the flow.. Post book that I’m reading that’s inspiring me today..

When my psyche takes a battering my creativity and soul just stops flowing..

Had personals trials and a teenage son struggling at school and with mental health. Just every day life can drain you..

I started a new type of journal this year that combines not just writing and thoughts but art as well. Started off well but the art and color dwindle away when my soul suffers. Thankfully I’ve pushed through with journaling.

I do tend to stay positive but that’s not the whole truth is it. Sometimes you have to let it rip lol and tell the dark moments too. Which is why the quote below touched me so deep today. Deep enough to move me here again.

I have a pile of books I dip into a little at a time lol. I so wish I could post my Goodreads book list here but I can’t make it show for some reason.

This is a very very timely quote below.. Creatives sometimes are not able to converse with everyone it’s hard to find people who talk openly about everything. Being almost deaf that list dwindle even more..

Oh how good it is to get a blog post out again..

“A healthy environment for imagination requires that emotions can come without restriction. This may not always be possible with other people around because not everyone can handle that kind of freedom.

When you find a place and people in which you can just allow your emotions to flow from an authentic place, then you have found treasure

Pattie Ann Hale from her book.. Find it on Amazon or buy it from her site..

Pattie Ann Hale – Fine Art

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