Let It Flow

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My writings starting to flow again… Blogged a few posts in quick succession but they really sprang from my inner desire to share on face book to people I try so hard to connect with on a deeper level but no matter what I write there’s so little feedback.. I wish I knew what it was I’m searching for. Why I have such a burning desire to share yet so often I struggle to say it or find a way to connect deeply to get it out with someone else, anyone else.

So so so often I’m blank. Which is a horrid feeling oh how I wish I could bounce ideas and thoughts about things with others… You have no idea how alone I am with my rambling thoughts… Which might be Gods way of getting me writing… I have been forcing myself most days to write three A4 pages which is really really hard to do…

An exercise suggested from the book “The Artists Way”.. That book is a story in itself. I bought it online as a kindle book and joined a face book group to do it with others… But I didn’t follow it through and dropped out.. Reading some of it and very spasmodically and just couldn’t get into it. Then a month ago I came across the paperback copy in a second hand shop for 5 dollars! Its screamed to me to pick it up again. Ok that’s a bit dramatic but my hungry heart for more couldn’t resist..

Most days I don’t go anywhere or see anyone and its really hard to write about nothing… I mean ok I have the every day goings on of raising kids… But to get that out normally… I just don’t have anyone to talk too about it.And the few who do its been a struggle to even talk to them for some reason about anything more than chit chat… I can only imagine its God helping me to get to the place I really need to be out of frustration etc… Its been a lonely road but if you follow my writings it’s been how God has gotten my full attention…

Its been a strange and weird path… Sitting in my bed writing this and I have art stuff, various books, papers and pens on my bed… I collect quote books, paper back books, art books, art supplies…etc the list goes on… And sigh I’ve been myself like a blank canvas… But I have even found those too.. Ha ha..

And with all this stuff inside my soul literally and nobody around to tell and the inability to tell it.. The collecting of stuff on the outside is really just a parody of what’s collecting on the inside.. Now just to find a use for it.

I can’t tell you though that I must have a gift for this. Or the Spirit is gifting me with it because I can think up words to use that I don’t even know and that I’ve never used ever. Maybe only hearing or reading of these in the past. These unfamiliar words appear when I’m writing and they mean exactly what I need to say.

To me thats God and its incredible.

I was told years ago by an English teacher I have a gift and could have gone on to university with it.

I’m going to keep up with it.. Writing and oh start to read more. But I’m distracted so easily. Terrible vice.

See the pic below. My oldest son who is a writer too gave me the film via dvd “Book Thief” and in it the word “Write” appears on a wall throughout the film. Seemed to be a huge sign to me..

Here is a canvas I’m working on also Pic below… Oh how good it is when the Spirit flows..

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